It’s that time of year when body image tends to worsen (lookin’ at you summer!). Follow these three tips to help improve body image during the challenging summer months but keep them in your back pocket to pull from all year ’round!
What is body image?
I talk about this in my best body image books post. There are so many different ways we could describe body image but I think of it as the mental picture you have of your body, which includes thoughts, feelings, attitudes and beliefs toward your body.
Body image is influenced by so many factors including systemic oppression (the culture telling you that thin bodies are best and fat bodies are bad), your genetic makeup, your history (including any trauma), your values, and so on.
Body image healing work is a practice – it’s not a destination you arrive at and then you can kick back on the lounge chair and drink margs all day (although wouldn’t that be nice?!). It’s a journey. A practice of continuing to come home to yourself and to your body.
Some days/weeks/months will be more challenging than others and will require more attention, energy, and grace, and other seasons will feel a little easier and lighter – maybe you won’t have to think about it all that much.
Body image healing work is about being in right relationship with your body. Think about other relationships you’re in – maybe with a partner, child, or friend. Some days you feel really connected with and supported by that person and other days you might feel at odds with them or disconnected.
You might feel lots of love toward that person one day and be completely frustrated with them the next. It’s the same experience for the relationship you have with your body.
And as I’m sure we’ve all experienced at one point or another, relationships take work. Sometimes hard work. Being in right relationship with your body takes work too. And that work can look like these three tips I offer up below (and of course can look like other things I don’t mention below – I only have so much space in one blog post!)
Tips to work toward better body image
1. Get curious about what your beliefs about bodies are.
Before you dive in, I find it can be helpful to have a baseline understanding of your body image today and how you got here. What are the factors that have shaped how you feel about your body today? This will give you a sense of context, understanding, and maybe even compassion for your thoughts and feelings about your here-and-now body.
Isn’t there a saying that in order to know where you’re going, you have to understand where you’ve been? I feel like I didn’t just make that up and I’m not sure who to attribute it to but I think it applies here :).
Maybe you create a body image timeline where you map out early childhood, school-age, pre-teen, adolescence, young adulthood, adulthood, and jot down any memories of experiences or events during those times in your life that influenced how you felt about your body (positive, negative, or neutral). Maybe you changed a behavior or took some action (i.e. started dieting) because of it and you can write about that too.
And/or maybe you do some journaling on the following reflection questions:
What are your current beliefs about bodies?
Who handed you those beliefs?
Are those your beliefs or someone else’s?
Where did you learn that some bodies are better than others?
How strong is each of those beliefs (rate on scale of 1-10)?
2. Get clear on what makes you feel better (and worse) in your body.
Alright ya’ll. Here’s what makes body image so tricky. It’s dynamic and perceptual in nature – it’s constantly changing based on internal and external factors.
Here’s an example of how this plays out:
You wake up in the morning, you put on a pair of baggy sweatpants, and you sit down next to someone who is bigger than you. In this moment, you might feel smaller and maybe better about your body.
Later in the day, after you’ve eaten a couple of meals, you’re feeling a little bloated, and now you’re wearing tight jeans. You hop on the train and sit down next to someone who is smaller than you. In that moment, you might feel bigger and maybe worse about your body. Your body size hasn’t objectively changed over the course of a day but the perception of your body has significantly changed.
Because body image is so perceptual in nature, it can be helpful to have a solid understanding of your perceptual body image triggers – what are the things that make you feel more positive to neutral about your body and what are the things that make you feel more negative toward your body?
Here are some examples of things that might make people feel better in their bodies:
hiking
cooler weather
wearing cute comfortable clothing
relatively low stress levels
yoga
getting a massage
taking a shower
skincare
Here are some examples of things that might make people feel worse in their bodies:
social media
stressful life events
PMS or being on their period
being bloated / experiencing GI distress
comparisons or body checking
warmer temperatures
sweating
not getting dressed in the morning
What would it feel like for you to make your own list? What would go on it?
You can use this perceptual body image map to help better understand your experience. If you’re feeling negative toward your body, you could reference your list to help you get a sense of what else might be going on that influenced that. You could also use the map to help you remember what tools or activities help you to feel slightly better in your body so you can pull from them.
Typically these things aren’t magic fixes that make you suddenly love your body but if you notice they make you feel 5% better about your body, that’s a win! We’re aiming for small subtle shifts, not perfection (because spoiler alert: perfection doesn’t exist).
3. Lead with self-compassion.
Self-compassion is part of the foundation of body image healing. Self-compassion involves treating yourself with kindness, being mindful in the moment of emotions without judgment, and remembering that your lived experience is part of being a human and others are struggling with the same things. If you want to learn more, check out my blog post that dives deeper into the the 3 tenets of self compassion.
Self-compassion can be used every step along the way of your healing journey. This too is a practice though so give yourself grace as you hone this skill.
Self-compassion involves treating yourself with kindness – this includes your body. This may look like:
nourishing your body with enough food that feels good
not punishing your body with rigorous exercise but instead engaging in movement that feels good
showering regularly and washing your face
going to bed early so you get enough sleep
resting when you’re tired or something aches
Self-compassion can also be utilized when you’re having a tough body image day. Rather than beating yourself up for experiencing negative body image, can you talk to yourself with warmth and kindness – “I’m sorry sweetheart, it’s so hard to sit with these negative feelings.”
Can you remind yourself that there are so many other people around the world that are also having a tough body image day and can you connect to the collectiveness of this very normal human experience to feel less alone?
Can you sit with the uncomfortable feelings and let them move through you rather than pushing them away?
Self-compassion can also be practiced when you’re not further along on your body image healing journey or when you feel you “should” be further along. Can you kindly remind yourself that body image healing is a practice and journey, not something to perfect or a destination to arrive at?
Can you appreciate this part that tries to manage your healing and wants what is best for you? Can you remind yourself that everyone is on their own healing journey and everyone is circling their own mountain to see the same face over and over. Remind yourself you are not alone on this journey.
What would you add to this list? What has helped you improve your body image? Tell me in the comments below!
For more support around body image, check out my other posts below:
Best Body Image Books
5 Tips to Cope with a Bad Body Image Day
3 Ways to Navigate When Clothes Don’t Fit You (without another diet!)
How to Make Your Social Media More Body Positive
